I Love You Lord...

The music in church today is beautiful. The congregants are singing worship to the Lord. I feel His presence in a mighty way in this place. I am home. It is Sunday. The family is gathered together, all my brothers and sisters in Christ, and we are visiting our Father's house. How blessed I am! I love the Lord so much, so much so that there are no words to describe my love for Him.

Being here among Brethren, soothes me. It's a beautiful time. There are moments of great blessing and one of those moments I treasure is the moment that the church service comes to that pleasant pause, when we are all in one accord and of one mindset. When we are all just worshipping Him and everything around us fades.

It's that point, that time and place, when we are so thankful and feel so loved that it's as if we are floating on air and we are right before His very throne. The pews are gone, the other worshippers praises fade, and it's just you and God.

How wonderful! During this time, I often sing this song that best describes how I feel in those very moments of worshipping pause. I don't remember who sings it but I hear it often playing on my hubby's laptop.

"I love You Lord,
And I lift my voice.
To worship You, O my soul rejoice
Take joy my King
In what You hear
Let it be a sweet, sweet sound
In Your Ear

I love you Lord
I love You, love You Lord
I love You Lord because You first loved me..."

I love my Lord so much, that whenever I do what is not right, I ache at the thought that I have disappointed Him.

Paul says in Romans seven, verse fifteen.."I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do."

I want to live for Christ, but like Paul and many others I am stumped when I do what I don't want to do. When I hurt The Lord, when I don't want to hurt Him but what I want to do is live one hundred percent for Christ and yet I don't.

How can I still say, "I love you Lord"? Well, because He STILL loves me, He is ever faithful, even when I am not.

He is merciful and lovingly kind, so much so, that when I come to Him with a pure and sincere heart, a heart in genuine anguish for disappointing Him, and ask for His forgiveness, yet again, He allows me to be at His feet and ask for forgiveness and receive it, receive it with a love that is pure, perfect, a love like no other.

"I love You Lord, and I lift my voice..."

I lift my voice in praise to Him, I lift my voice to glorify Him, I lift my voice to cry out for His forgiveness, a forgiveness so willingly given when the remorse is sincere. I lift my voice and cry tears of joy because of His love for me and the gift of salvation and because one day I will see Him face to face. I lift my voice and praise Him because I know He is waiting for me and preparing a place for me.

In John chapter fourteen and verse two, Jesus, my savior, says, "In my Father's house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you.

"...To worship You, o my soul rejoice,"

My soul is filled with joy when I worship Him. I rejoice in Him and in all that He is.

"...Take joy my King, in what You hear,"

Every praise I offer to Him, every song that I sing for Him, every word that I speak for Him, every phrase that I write down for Him, I truly desire for it to bring Him, Him, Him, JOY! It's all about Him. It's all about me pleasing Him, loving Him, worshipping Him. glorifying Him. I want Him to be happy with everything He hears coming out of my mouth and written down by my hand. Take joy, my King, in What You hear, and let it be a sweet, sweet sound in Your ear."


I love You Lord

My Peace I Give Unto You

I have been dealing with this disease for so long and I marvel at God's wonderful presence throughout my journey with achalasia. God has sustained me when many who I have been privelaged to meet, who have this disease, have gone. I've had it since birth and recently stopped working because it became debilitating, I'm pretty sure I've shared this before but things got so bad that My hubby put his ministry on hold for a few years to care for me.
Well, we are back and having a great time working for God and fellowshipping with the congregation and nurturing and loving them.
Yesterday was rough (healthwise) and a bit scary. Something is off. I can feel a change coming. My body is weaker.
While praying this afternoon The Lord let me know that if He chooses for this to be the beginning of the end or if He chooses to continue to sustain me, He will give me peace. And boy did He ever. I, immediately was flooded in His presence and His peace. Instantly!
If and when I do get weaker, please know that God has not left my side and I am holding on tightly to Him. I've been more than blessed to have gotten this far and will be more than blessed, if the trip, (my life), is extended.
Let this posting be of hope that when and if you ever have a situation in your life, calling out to God will give you peace.


John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."


"Jesus hold me now
I need to feel you in this place
I long for your embrace" ~ Casting Crowns

Karyn Henly

" I'm convinced the more we become like Jesus and raise our children to be like Jesus, the better influence we'll be in our community, country, and the world" ~Karyn Henley - Woman's Life Bible

Karyn Henly's Blog- http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/profile.php?id=505960028&ref=ts

Walking with God

I love God. I know that and so does He. I don't think I say to people," I love God" enough. I realized this when I spoke with two members of the congregation yesterday. It was after Sunday School. The lesson was about being Holy. The teacher asked, "What motivates you to be holy?" He answered, "Personally what motivates me, is that I want to please God." Someone else replied that they want to be holy because they want God to know He is appreciated.

I thought to myself., "I want to be holy (separated for Christ) because I just plain out love Him. I want to be with Him. I want to walk with Him, live for Him, talk to him,etc.
After the lesson we spoke in the church "cafeteria" about why we are holy and one brother said, "It all boils down to love. The Lord says, " ...You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment." He was quoting Matthew 22:37. He went on to say if you love the Lord you will be holy.

At that point. I forgot where I was. I looked away from Him and, seriously as we walked up to the sanctuary, I dreamily said, "I Love God." I said it out loud. I don't think I ever said it that way to anyone before. I said it with the deepest , most genuine sincerity and meant it with every fiber of my being.

I want to walk with God. I want to be in a constant communion with Him just because He is so wonderful. He is so merciful. His loving kindness is everlasting and His mercy endures forever. He is always faithful and I want to walk with Him because He will show me the way.

He created me for Him and I want to live for Him. Simple? No? If anyone of us thinks this isn't so simple, well, then WE should question what is distracting us from a constant communion/walk with God, cause, NOTHING should be getting in our way from walking with Him, ALL the time 24/7. Nothing, unless we allow it to.

Video Blogging

I will be attempting to video blog soon. :) on this blog

The Woman at the Well

I was reading the book of John chapter four, the story of the woman at the well, a story I've read many times before and noticed for the first time how the story offers two perspectives on salvation. It offers a viewpoint of the person offering the salvation and the side of the person receiving it. The Savior and the soon to be saved.

The story goes that Jesus was leaving Judea and on his way to Galilee, in an effort to avoid the disputes among the Pharisees going on in Judea about His ministry. To get to Galilee Jesus needed to go through Samaria. This would be all well and good except for the fact that Jews and Samaritans did not get along. Jews considered Samaritans a mixed breed and therefore they were looked upon as Gentiles and not real Jews. The Samaritans also worshipped other gods and did many atrocious things.

But this place, Samaria, is where Jesus needed to travel through.

Jesus takes a break from His journey to Galilee and stops in, of all places, Samaria. Not only does He need to go through it but now He STOPS!

In the story, it is late afternoon. We find Jesus sitting by Jacob's well and He is alone because the Disciples went into the city to buy food. Then a woman approaches the well. She begins to draw water from it when Jesus asks her for a drink of water. She immediately recognizes Jesus as a Jew and wonders why He wanted a drink from her, a Samaritan, a woman.

Here is where the story reveals an opportunity, a window, into both sides of salvation.

First let us observe the perspective of the soon to be saved Samaritan woman and while we do let's try to remember who we were and how we felt before we were saved.

As the story of the woman at the well unfolds we discover that she was a woman of ill repute. A woman who had five husbands and the man she was with now was a married man. She was in adultery. We also discover, as we read on, that she feels remorseful and ashamed. It is never written but it is picked up in the exchange between her and Jesus. She knew the life in which she was living was wrong.

How do we know that she was ashamed?

Simple, it was late afternoon when she went to draw water from the well.

It was customary for the women to draw water early in the morning while the weather was still cool. There would be no one by the well in the late afternoon, in the heat of the day. She knew this. She avoided the crowd of women by the well earlier because she was ashamed and afraid of being ostracized. She would not take the chance. She did not want to risk the stares, the name calling, the whispers , the judgement and the rejection. So she waited until the "coast was clear" and no one was around.

Can you imagine how she must have felt?

She was not a woman who flaunted her sin. She was very mortified. She was depressed.

Do you remember how you felt before you were saved?

Perhaps you were depressed, in search of a better way of life, embarrassed of your lifestyle, looking for something to fill that empty void in your life, remorseful for the things you had done that were not pleasing to God, feeling guilty and ashamed.

It is a good thing to look back every so often and remember who we were before we were saved and what it felt like. In this way we are not so quick to judge others who are not saved, so harshly, because not too long ago we were in the same place.

We were like the woman at the well but God, as always has perfect timing. Just like the woman, God placed us, in the right place at the right time so He could show us His grace, kindness ,love and compassionate mercy so that we may be saved.

Now let us look at the point of view of the one who offers salvation.

Here, we find Jesus, the Messiah, at this time and place by the well in Samaria. He is tired, as anyone would be after a long journey. He needs rest. The disciples were off getting food for Jesus and we read here that He asked for water.

He was tired, hungry and thirsty. But he knew He had to be there at that time at that place and He did not let His discomfort stop Him from showing sincere compassion, kindness and revealing salvation to a lost soul.

After being saved ourselves, have we let our personal discomfort get in the way of ministering to the needs of others with sincere compassion and kindness?

Jesus knew the woman was a Samaritan, yet He spoke to her kindly.
He sat there and when she approached, He didn't get up and leave, instead He asked for water. He spoke to her as if she were any other person in need.

Three reasons why someone would think this was not a good idea (they’d be wrong) but some people back then and perhaps now think...1. Why is Jesus talking to her, she is a woman? 2. She is a Samaritan and... 3. She is in adultery.

But Jesus saw none of that. He saw a sad and lost soul in need of salvation.

He had no favoritism. Look at the message He brought to her.

The mere fact that He struck up a conversation with her, let her see that she was significant and valued enough to be spoken to. He was not acting as if He needed to do her a favor. He did not treat her as if she were garbage. He did not look at her as if she was lower than Him AND He did not insult her intelligence when He spoke to her deep, spiritual truths.

Jesus looked beyond her exterior and saw her spiritual hunger. And He valued her even though He knew her failings.

Later in the chapter we will see how she admitted to her adultery. She was honest and owned up to her sin. She acknowledged it and yet He still valued her.

Like Jesus, we need to offer salvation to the lost sinner with kindness, without judgment without demeaning the person or without thinking we are better than they are.

Remember where you were then and remember who you are now.

There but for the grace of God, go I.

At one time we were at the receiving end like the woman at the well and now many of us are at the giving end, offering salvation , like Jesus.

Two experiences. Two perspectives.

Talk About Patience

I was reading the Book of Genesis today and was struck by Abraham and Sarah's story. I've read it a million times but you know how it is. There is always something new in God's Word. I read how God promises Abraham that he will have a son and that Sarah will give birth to the son and if you do your math, you'll realize that it took twenty five years for that promise to be fulfilled. Twenty five years!! The Bible doesn't record any times of doubt or giving up on Abraham and Sarah's part during those years. This does not include the initial statement of promise, when Sarah laughed and doubted.
It just amazes me, how God's timing is perfect and if He says He is going to do something He will. God doesn't break promises. So when you start to doubt and think that God forgot you, remember this story. I sure will.

Erm...

I was brought up in church. I am a very observant person and as a child I mimicked everything I heard and saw. People fascinated me. They still do. I loved watching and listening to people then and I love to watch and listen to people now.

I remember listening to the prayers of the adults around me and thinking, "Wow, those are some fancy words." and "One day, when I'm older I will be just as fancy shmancy with my prayers."

The prayers of the adults around me, almost always began, "Padre Altisimo, Que estas en los Cielos", translated, "Most High Father who dwells in the Heavens." That was just the beginning, the intro , the salutation. Can you imagine the rest of the prayer. I can tell you that it became more fancy as it went on.

I assumed, of course that eventually my prayers will become effortless and fluid and flow out of my mouth with ease and eloquence but I was wrong.

As I got older I was asked to pray before others, sometimes a small group, like my Sunday School class and sometimes a large group, like the entire congregation. I couldn't help but erm.. my way through my public prayers. I am an erm..ummer public pray-er. I can't help it.

I became frustrated that my prayers were not elaborate and eloquent and soon panicked when asked to pray publicly because I would end up sounding incompetent. My public praying is so different than my personal ones. I don't erm so much and sometimes not at all.

One day it just occurred to me that the reason for my ermming was because I was uncomfortable. I was thinking about who was around me and how to impress them with my words and not so much in the words and who I was talking to.

I thought I had to sound fancy in order to sound spiritual and that was the problem. I shouldn't have wanted to sound spiritual. I should have wanted to speak to God, to praise Him, to Honor Him, to ask of Him in faith with a sincere heart and without wanting to impress. Again, I had to forget about the words and meditate on who I was talking to. I had to erase from my mind the fact that there was anyone around me and have that intimate conversation with God. That's what prayer is.

Prayer is not a speech. It's more personal than that.

I still erm...um through some of my prayers both private and public but not for the same reasons, and not as much. I think God likes unrehearsed prayer because He like us to be ourselves and in being ourselves, sometimes, we are at a loss for words and sometimes we stammer a bit when we speak and sometimes the words are hard to find and that's okay, as long as we are praying sincerely.

We don't speak flawlessly to each other. We are human and at times during our conversations with others, it is difficult to put into words what we want to express. That's just the way it is.

So whether you are a public pray-er who speaks with fluency to God or one that erms your way through your talks with God, all that matters is that you are honest and you remember who you are speaking to and revere Him in your prayers.

In my Biblical study of being a submissive wife, I am learning so much

A Wifes Biblical Submission study by Sunny

http://biblicalsubmission.blogspot.com/search/label/WEEK%20%231

I still have to learn how to use Mr. Linky I don't know how to link back other than how I posted the link above.

I just began the study and it is an uphill climb. The seriousness of the committment to be the submissive wife is appropriate. This is serious. I have always been a submissive wife but this study has shown me that being submissive for submissives sake is not the right way instead being submissive for God and His glory is different. I want to please God and I want to be obedient. I want Him to be glorified. I also want to please my husband and in doing so honor God, for I belong to God and my husband. This is something many modern day Christian wives have a hard time with but the word of God tells us that we need to be submissive. That's it. If it's in the Word it is to be taken in and applied no questions asked.

I am committing myself to this study and hoping to grow closer to God through it and closer to my husband. I'm already seeing my marriage and my husband in a whole new light. My marriage was very good before this study but I already feel it getting better because God is helping me to see my husband the way He wants me to see him and the view is fantastic.

A Wife's Biblical Submission

I was surfing the net. Does anyone still say that? Anyway I was looking for Blogs written by Christian Women and then I went on CWO (Christian Women Online). On the CWO site I saw an article titled Sister 2 Sister and read about Sunny Shell and her Bible Study available online called "A Wife's Biblical Submission http://biblicalsubmission.blogspot.com/2008/08/welcome.html I was intrigued and went on the site and quickly decided that I wanted to join the study. I want to join to please God and be a good wife to my husband. I want to learn more about becoming the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31, for His glory and then for my husband, family and lastly for myself.
I have been married for twenty-eight years. I was a young bride and now at the age of forty-five I am a grandmother. I have three precious daughters between the ages of twenty-five and thirty. I have one grandson and another grandchild on the way.
I taught in a New York private school for eleven years (First through third grades)and because of my disability was obligated by doctors to stop working. I miss teaching so much but I know that all things work together for good. I am a happily married pastors wife.

His Affection

Yesterday during the sermon my husband, the Pastor, took me by surprise when he spoke of me during his sermon. I was surprised because I had asked him not to speak of my health when he preached.

Anyway... the verse, the sermon was based on was

Proverbs chapter 3:5, 6

5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.

He broke the verses down and ministered according to Gods will. It was

very edifying. Glory to God.

Toward the end of the sermon my husband said, "I am going to say this, and I'll probably say it a thousand times more, but I see a miracle everyday in my wife." Then he pointed at me and smiled.

I was stunned because I knew he was referring to my health and I specifically asked him not to speak of it, but right after the initial shock the Lord spoke to my heart and told me that He had a purpose and my husband needed to share the story. So I listened quietly to what the Lord was going to say through the story.

My husband went on to say that there are things in this world we might not understand but God knows all. His ways are not our ways.

He spoke of the last time I was hospitalized and how lengthy the hospital stay was and how he was very afraid because the doctors spoke to him and told him they didn't know what was going to happen. This is the first I was hearing of this. The doctors told him that if I beat the infection, I will improve but it was wait and see and five weeks later I was still in the hospital and not doing well and at one point I didn't even recognize him.

I was heartbroken to hear that and grateful I didn't remember not knowing who he was. He went on to say how he just broke down and cried and how he asked God if he was praying wrong. Then he said the words that God was longing to hear. My husband said, "No matter what happens, if she dies or if she lives, You are still God."

The next day when he went to see me at the hospital, I was up, lucid and on my way to recovery.

The doctors say there is no cure for my disease and it's still just wait and see but God is sustaining me and I am doing well. Praise God.

Four days ago my second child was very ill, and I had to care for her because her husband was away. I had her sleep in my home for a couple of days so that I can keep an eye on her. Those were a grueling two days.

On the third day we went to the doctor's office. I took her hand when she went through her painful test. I helped her through it, as any mother would.

She is feeling better today but still has a few more results to wait for, please keep her in prayers.

The point is, that we cannot understand how God works but we need to trust Him. I was supposed to have died and yet I did not, and still even more remarkable is the fact that I was well enough to care for my daughter. When at this point, according to the doctors, I should have been the one taken care of. God is amazing.

Since my husband has been a pastor, there have been many ups and downs but the ministry has always been rewarding and one of the rewards is the fact that I have seen how much my husband loves God and how much he loves me .

He has always been an affectionate man with me and because Christ is the center of our marriage, he has shown us both the importance of each other and how valuable we are to each other.

Thank you Lord, for my husband.

Father God,

Thank you for my husband and please help me and my husband to continue being affectionate towards each other in a sincere manner and an example to others that if You are in our lives, the love between us is real and strong, and that it is so important for us to know the importance of You being in the center of our marriage.

Keep our love for each other strong and the affection for one another honest. Help me to see my husband as a man who loves and values me and may I always love and value him and never ever leave the desire to show him affection always, and in an appropriate fashion.

Help me to show him affection when he needs it the most. Let me know when he needs that extra hug or peck on the cheek, when I don't see the need. Help him to see the need in me as well.

Help me to understand when it is not about me. Help us to lift each other up always, and never shy from being affectionate towards each other.

The best thing is Lord, and I thank you for this, is that first and foremost my husband loves You and because he loves You, he can love me and does, And because You are in my life, I will always love him. I asked that You stay in our marriage Lord, always.

In the name of Jesus Christ.

Amen

The Power of a Praying Wife

I have been participating, or at least trying to, with the 30 days of prayer for my hubby. The first two days went well and then the enemy got mad and so there have been trials for the last three days, and I haven't been able to speak with God the way I should be and especially for my hubby. So I am catching up and when I should be on day 6(?) I am on Day Three.

MY PRAYER

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you Lord, for my hubby and thank you for making him a giver, even though at times I don't understand it, I thank you for giving him the heart to give and the wisdom to me, not to protest his giving. My hubby is truly a blessing and I thank you for him.
Thank you lord for always providing for us and giving my hubby the strength to get up each and every morning and work for his family and your church. Thank you Lord for allowing me to help my hubby and not to spend the money he works so hard for frivolously and unresponsibly,in order to provide for the family and to tithe and to give offering and to help others.
Forgive the doubts and the times I didn't see the financial blessings you have provided.
Thank you lord for helping us when we were at rock bottom and always providing us with the basic needs of food clothing and shelter.
Lord Thank you for giving us the strength and loyalty to stick by each other and never to give up on each other.
Thank you Lord for such a hard working man and for giving me the ability to trust that because he is God fearing and hard working that I will never be without.

"Consider the lilies..."

Consider the lilies how they grow: they toil not, they spin not; and yet I say unto you, that Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. Luke 12:27

Thank you Lord for getting us through when we thought we wouldnt make it and thank you for keeping a roof over our heads, food on the table and clothes on our backs.

Lord, I ask that we be content and continue to trust that you will provide for our every need and remember all the times you have provided for the needs and tossed in a treat every now and then.
I appreciate all those times Lord and know that there will be more and so I trust in You.

Lord, I ask that you continue to work through Angel, and that you continue to give him the strength to work both outside and in your fields.
I ask Lord, that you give him peace and wisdom as you have in the past to care for our family and to place You in the center of our finances and our lives.
I know Lord, that Angel loves You, His love for You is obvious and his desire to serve You and others is apparent.
Lord, I pray that he may be encouraged, continue working in him and give him strength peace and joy to continue in Your path.

"I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread." Psalm 37:25


Thank you Lord for Angel ,I know you will continue to provide for us and that you will continue to give him the strength needed to work and for me to make his return from work a pleasant one, and that I continue to show my appreciation for him.
Lord, I ask You to let him know , in some way, that he is very appreciated by us and that all his hard work is not in vain.
Lord, thank you because I know You are our Provider, I never expected to be where I am today and I can only imagine what blessings you have in store for my hubby and family and for our future.

Thank you Lord for giving me the confidence to know that everything will be okay.
Thank you Lord for a hubby who makes me feel safe, and secure financially and in other ways.

In the Name of Jesus Christ
Amen



Consider The Lilies
Written by: Joel Hemphill



Consider the lilies they don’t toil nor spin
And there’s not a king with more splendor than them
Consider the sparrow they don’t plant or sow
But they’re fed by the Master who watches them grow



We have a Heavenly Father above
With eyes full of mercy
And a heart full of love
He really cares when
Your head is bowed low
Consider the lilies and then you will know


Now may I introduce you to this friend of mine
Who hangs out the stars and tells the sun when to shine
And kisses the flowers each morning with dew
But He’s not too busy to care about you

Youth Today

A friend of mine (Elizabeth Lopez)posted this on Facebook. It's a very moving and insightful post written by her fifteen year old son. I had to share it and so I asked permission to post it here. I am so impressed with this young mans very perceptive view on the youth around him. He has an amazing spiritual maturity and it is evident in his writing, which makes it all the more extraordinary because he has so much more growth ahead of him, as we all do.

Enjoy

The bottom of this post has my signature on it but it was not written by me

Youth Today As Seen Through My Fifteen Year Old Son's Eyes

My son wrote this on his Myspace page and I just had to share he was speaking from his heart. I am so proud of him God has BIG plans for him....


"What's happened to living lives seperated and holy unto God? What happened to walking with him in the rough and praising Him in the good? What happened to being different from the world? What happened to being the kids with different music in the ipod, not stressing over relationships, not trying to sneak behind our parent's backs, staying pure til marriage, building each other up not tearing down, having clean mouths and jokes and being easily seperate from the crowd? Why do we sit on the fence b/w Christianity and the world. We mock those who do right and brag about doing wrong. We tear each other down and fight each other when our adversary the Devil sneaks about seeking prey. He has a grip so tight we can't even muster breath to pray. We can tell why Chris Brown beat up Rhianna or who at school is dating who? But we can't say who built the ark nor why Daniel was in a lion's den. The sad part is we gave the Devil his grip and don't fight to make him let go. Who'll step up and fight. Who'll go against the crowd. Who'll pray over their food and read a Bible at school? I'm gonna take the plunge to be sold out. Who else will? Who'll be a Daniel and go against the wishes of the people and be persecuted for worshipping God, who'll be like Noah and be mocked for doing God's will and work no matter what the outcome may be. Who'll stand up in our youth groups and say lets stop fighting each other and worrying about the latest gossip and get the message out to a lost and dying world. I was shocked today as I continually see what today's Christians are doing. Do we even know what happens post-Salvation? Do we even hear the Holy Spirit call? I'm taking the plunge today to be 100% sold-out. To go against the crowd and keep God's music in my ear, worry about my relationship with God not a girl, stay pure til marriage, study His word, pray without ceasing, be where Christians ought to be not hanging out in places we have no business in, use words and jokes that Christians ought to say. 100% who else is with me? I've been on this road a long time, I thought there were more behind me traveling towards God as well. Clearly not. But that can change. Who wants it to though?"

By Dashaun

Pollyanna or Eeyore

It's 9:35 a.m. on a Saturday in Brooklyn, New York. The sun is shining and the high is predicted to be in the eighties. It should be a great day.

Refelcting, I am thinking that, it should also be a great day, if it was cloudy , cold and the high's in the thirties, shouldn't it?

I love the sun and the warmth it makes me happy. I do not like the cold at all, especially because I am anemic and the slightest breeze, seems like a wind chill sweeping down from the arctic. Okay, that was an exaggeration.

Most days I wake up and the first thing out of my mouth is "Thank You Jesus" Praise will continue spewing out of my mouth as I slide my feet inside my cozy slippers and shuffle off to the bathroom and freshen up to start my day. The groggy but sincere praises come out in a froggy voice until I start to brush my teeth and then the praises are mentally sent forth.

Everything is good.

My routine is morning coffee, while reading through some Christian Women's blogs (I love the early fellowship with sisters, it is highly motivating)

Coffee, sunshine, good reading, comfy coziness, Thank you Jesus.

Who wouldn't be thankful under such serene and content circumstances?

The birds are tweeting and I can hear the faint laughter of children playing in the park across the street. if I were to look out my window I would see people walking their cute, very groomed puppies and the occassional runner trotting by.

*sigh*

Life is good. Thank you Jesus.

But in the real world, there are mornings, when I wake up and in my almost gutteral voice say, an almost forced, and not so sincere, obligatory, "Thank you Jesus for this day..." I might as well offer up an offensive blah blah blah, because the worship and praise and thanks is not coming from my heart. It is forced and I have made it mandatory.

Why, do I wake up like that on some days?

Well, obviously it's because I didn't sleep well the night before and so I wake up achy. The room is still dark because it is cloudy outside and it looks like rain all day. I'm cold and the heat hasn't kicked in and when I attempt to slide my feet inside my cozy slippers for warmth, I miss, and almost trip, causing my bare feet to touch the cold hardwood floors.

Argh!

I shuffle off to the bathroom and find that I didn't replace the empty tube of toothpaste with a fresh new one from the pantry and there are no D*xie cups for my mouthwash.

Grrrr.

Grumble, grumble, grumble.

So... I drag myself to the cupboards, when the telephone rings, I check the caller I.D and it is a telemarketer. More grumbling from me.

If we are to be honest, we would admit that not everyday begins with a "Pollyanna Morning of Greatness" and positive thoughts. It is more like an "Eeyore Dragging Morning of Gloom"

Bluebirds aren't circling our heads and we don't prance around all giddy singing our favorite worship songs.

I want to get to the point in my life where I am spiritually mature enough to wake up in the cold, damp, dark apartment realizing, I didnt set the coffee maker the night before and ran out of filters, stubbing my toe on the corner of the kitchen table and not letting all of it ruin my day or set the tone for the rest of it.

I want to find joy in all , not a maniacal laughing at all the things that go wrong during the day but an "It sucks but it's okay" attitude.

So what? There are no coffee filters and you forgot to replace the tube of toothpaste. So, it's cold and the heat isn't on. God is still in control and life is still good and so God I sincerely worship you this morning, NOT to force myself into doing it but because in the grand scheme of things I always know that you are and always will be. I will always know that You love me and that everything is going according to your plans as long as I continue to follow your direction.

Good Morning Lord and thank you, from the bottom of my heart!

A Clip from the movie "Pollyanna" Notice her positive attitude in spite of all the nastiness around her:)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UL-jtuw570c

There are people around us who need to know Christ. Instead of looking for something "big" to do, begin today to invest your gifts and talents in one person-Babbie Mason

It's Been A while

I haven't written in a while but I assure you I have been very reflective;)
New post coming sometime today :) Don't give up on me :)

Please Pray For.....

Sister Marisol who will be undergoing brain surgery to remove a tumor on Monday. We are thinking about her and her family. We believe God's hands are in the entire situation. I look forward to seeing Sister Marisol back in action, I have faith it will be sooner than expected.

I was thinking about a lot of things today. I was getting all deep and thinking of God and all that He is. I was especially pensive, not to mention extremely grateful for His mercy. When I began to think of all the times I messed up and how God has forgiven me, I am truly amazed. The Word says His lovingkindness is everlasting and His MERCY endures forever. It sure does. I am beyond appreciative for God's mercy. I just wanted to take time to express my gratitude.

Have a great day!

Yesterday was a very interesting day at church. Sofi led the devotional part of the service and was singing before the congregation. Her hubby Rob was working the projector and Aunt Becky sat behind me with Jake. I was very into the service and worshipping when I felt a tug on my skirt. I looked down to see that it was Jake. "Muma, can I sit with Naomi?" Naomi is Jakes new best friend. He has been on several playdates with her and her family attends the same church we pastor. I was reluctant but looked over at Naomi and her family and remembered the last time I said no,I discovered that Naomi had cried herself to sleep right there on the church pew, so I bent down and eye level with Jake said, "Jake, you can sit with Naomi, BUT you have to promise me you will be at your very best behavior." He looks at me wide eyed, there is no answer. I repeat,"Okay?" Jake finally but hesitantly responds, "Okay."My hubby is accompanying the singers and Jakes Mom is singing. His dad is working the projector in the music room and Aunt Becky is sitting behind me. I send Jake off and he runs over to Naomi who is waiting... all smiles. I return to worshipping and enjoying the devotion for a few minutes more before I start to worry about Jake and Naomi. I hope they are behaving I glance over to find Jake performing the only dance moves to the devotion. Some moves were familiar, ala John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever. I gasped and looked at the members who were sitting in the pews around him. They were very distracted and at the same time charmed by Jakes little performance. All eyes were on Jake. I walked as quickly as I could over to Jake, trying my best to avoid making a scene. I reach Jake and grab his hand and pull him to the back of the church. Me- "Jake, you can't dance in church"Jake- "Why?"Me- "Because....you just can't. People are trying to sing and worship and they are all looking at you."Jake-(delighted, puts his liitle open faced hand on his chest) Me?"Jake- (I'm irked and at the same time amazed by my grandson.) Slowly and as calmly as I could I said "Jake, you are going to go back and sit with Naomi and you are going to beh....."Jake ran off and joined Naomi on the second pew of the church.I composed myself, straightened my skirt and returned to the first pew where I was sitting before being distracted. I looked over at Hubby who mouths "Let him be" I'm frustrated and can't get back into worship. When did I become such a Fuddy Duddy?I felt bad, maybe I was too harsh with Jake. I looked over at my sweet little grandchild and I saw him repeating the SAME MOVES!!! *Sigh*I shrugged my shoulders. I gave up and then I tried really hard not to laugh.

My hubby reminds me of a famous quote

"Let the children come to the father for theirs is the kingsom of Heaven" -Jesus Christ

Interruptions

I woke up this morning and immediately thought of God and then within three minutes, I was interrupted and sighed. But this is life. In our dreams our Utopian fantasies, we wish we could have constant communication with our Savior. It is a need, a desire . It is life. If I could I would close myself up and inside my house and just commune with Him but I know in a very real way that, God wants us to open up and to others and we cant do that if we close ourselves in and we cant tell others about Him if we are closed in. So we have to face life and ask God for the wisdom in learning how to balance life with our need to be with Him. It's possible. It is. Life is good and happy and a blessing. But I'll tell you one thing I can't wait for the day when I will be with Christ and there will be no interruptions.

Hubby is praying in the bedroom and I hear his gentle voice as it becomes muffled through the bedroom wall and enters into the living room where i sit and type this. He will occasionally sing a few lines from an old hymn and return to his prayer. If i open the bedroom door i can also hear the turning of the thin pages of his Bible. The praise and worship eases my mind and puts a smile on my face as God fills this home with His peace.
As a pastor's wife....rather, as THIS pastor's wife I will do my utmost to encourage and support him. I will pray for my husband and his ministry, a ministry given to him by God. He is a mere vessel and my prayer is that God continues to be glorified in the sermons and in Hubby's task and responsibility as a pastor to His church.
I never thought in a million years that I would marry someone who would become a pastor but here I am honored that God allowed me this privileged. My goal is to be a good servant,wife, mother and pastor's wife and I ask that God lead me in every way. To reveal to me the way sin which I can be helpful to my hubby , in this way, he can find a second sanctuary at home and with me and the family, the first sanctuary being, of course in God.

I feel a revival coming. I feel it deep in my soul and to be honest with you I am truly excited!!!!!!

Brand New day

About two years ago I became too ill to work and had to leave teaching after eleven years. As anyone who has ever been a teacher knows, that during the school year, you spend more time at work than with your own family.
I worked at a very prestigious school in New York. I totally believe that God has blessed me in that job placement for the amount of time that I was there.
I taught the children of actors, directors, writers, CEO's ,Doctors, Lawyers etc. You get the picture.
The quality of my work (and the other faculty) was under constant scrutiny and observation, and understandably so. If I were paying the tuition for the school, these parents were paying...I would expect nothing but the best.
Working there was a joy. The children were awesome. The faculty became friends and the administration was very supportive. I even became friends with some of the parents.
There were lots of extracurricular activities planned for those working at the school as well, workshops, conventions and other things. There were book readings, book signings, parties and more, MOST were not obligatory to attend, but there was an unwritten rule that we should attend as many as we could.
Diversity was big. The tolerance for any race, religion, lifestyle was to be practiced. If not you were looked down upon.
I am all for diversity.
As a Christian living according to the teachings of Jesus Christ, I was and still am very accepting of many things, But there are some things, for the very same reason, I am not accepting of, BUT I love all, because Jesus loves us all, and I can not say I love God if I have no love for my neighbor.

warning- Possible overuse of the word exposure ahead

Having said that, working at the school also exposed me to things, situations and people I never thought I would be exposed to and I tried to be a light during the time I was exposed to them, primarily the times when lifestyle was being brought into the curriculum and workshops and my Christianity was tolerated less and less.
This did not stop me from sharing, I was not shy about what I believe and what I didn't believe in, at the same time not waning from my love to those who practiced such lifestyles.
I made friends first, and learned more about them later. I had gay freinds, transgender friends and even made a friend who I learned later on in our friendship was a Wicken.
Why were these diverse groups of people being exposed to me?
I knew right off the bat, that there was a purpose and I prayed for the Lord to allow me NOT to stray from my beliefs, but to continue to be a light, not to conform, but to be a vessel in the possible transformation of these lives, because I truly grew to love them just as Christ loves me.
I loved my friends and tried, for many years, to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ with them.
I loved teaching, but God was putting a burden in my heart that I needed to leave my job and look for another one. Things would be getting progressively worse, and my time there was over.
I scattered many seeds and now I had to trust God and move on.
I started looking for other jobs but nothing happened. I started to doubt that maybe God doesn't want me to leave, and it was tugging at my hearts strings to leave, the children, my friends and my job behind.
I stopped searching and chalked it all up to misunderstanding what I thought God was trying to tell me, and so I continued to work and things got worse.
The school was becoming more and more liberal in a negative way and less tolerant of Christianity. The burden to leave was becoming stronger but, again, I ignored it and continued in disobedience.
Of course, all the way, I justified my disobedience with the fact that I was a Christian and I needed to be there. But God wasn't having it, and I needed to understand.
It became more obvious to me that I HAD to leave. I became fearful for my spiritual life and so I started sharpening my resumes, when suddenly I became sick.
I was born with the illness I have and by Gods grace, I was always able to live with it. I suffered but God gave me strength. Suddenly out of nowhere without any warning, a sickness I lived with throughout my life took a sharp turn, and worsened dramatically and overnight. I got so sick I could not function.
I was forgetting things. I could not process what was being directed to me. I forgot the names of children. I would lose their work and misplace progress reports. It was horrible, to the point where I spoke to my director and told him I needed help. The administration was very helpful and made arrangements and provided classroom help for me. Until it got so bad my doctor said I could not work again.
When my doctor said those words, it finally became clear to me what God needed to do in order for me to finally accept that I was not supposed to be where I was.
And so, finally, and unfortunately being forced to, having no other options, in obedience I left my teaching and the school.
I had not been working for two years but kept in contact with many faculty members who became friends, and who visited and kept in contact with me, and still do during my illness.
One of these friends invited me to a function to raise money for women of the Congo who were being raped, abused and mutilated, as a Christian I jumped right on the bandwagon.
The female faculty was giving a performance at my old school, called "The V*gina Monologues" I had heard a little about about this performance. I never saw it, but I knew that it had to do with empowerment and although the title of the performance was disapproving TO ME. I accepted the invite to attend, for the women of the Congo.
I attended and immediately regretted it. The cause was great, but the performance was, in my opinion, crude and obscene. I was embarassed to be there mostly, because all the while God was telling me in his sweet patient voice, "I removed you from here for a reason. Why did you come back? You are not listening to me."
I was ashamed, but this time I finally got that I am not supposed to be there. Slow huh?
The next day I was at service, and the service was awesome. The presence of God was strong and the blessings were pouring down from the heavens and all the while, while worship was going on, while the sermon was being preached, and during the calling, all I could do was cry and say, "I'm sorry God."
I was sorry for returning to a place where God had rescued me from. I was sorry I disobeyed God, I was sorry I led other people into thinking that I would be accepting to exposure of crudeness.
I was sorry in every way.
To some this might seem minuscule, but to me it was something very big and something very wrong.
Gods mercy endures forever, and He forgives us of our many sins and I know He forgave me yesterday when I cried out to him to forgive me, but he also said this to me and it continually echoes in my brain and in my soul. "It's a Brand New Day."
Sometimes we argue with God because, for some dumb reason, we think we know better than Him. We would never say aloud that we disagree with Him, but our actions say it, each and every time we choose to ignore His voice and continue to la-di-da through life, covering our ears so that we muffle His voice.
How hurtful is that?
How disrespectful is that?
How irreverent is that?
It is very hurtful, disrespectful and irreverent, but today is a brand new day, behold all things are new.
I am so immensley grateful that my God gives me so many chances. He is a patient God and a loving God.
I will not be returning to a place where He does not want me. The shame of what I did was too grand. To some it may be a big stink over nothing, but to me it was much more about the disobedience than about anything else and then about the exposure of indecency, it was horrid.
BUT...
Today is a Brand New Day

Good Morning!

I woke up this morning determined once again to live the life that God wills me to live. I realize that I cannot live it, if I do not know His will and so I begin my day with prayer. In this way, I can be led by The Spirit in which direction to walk and in which choices to make in the small things and in the big things.

I have come to know that ALL decisions no matter how minuscule we think they are should be made under the security and the trust that God knows what is best for us. It is all about believing that God has our best interest at heart.

Last night I made a schedule of things to do. This is not my first To Do list but the first item on my list is and always should be prayer and reading of scripture. I cannot possibly begin my day without this, even morning coffee takes second place.

How can I even live without talking, communicating with God at the start of my day and throughout the day? How will I know what to do when a crisis arises or when an important decision has to be made? How will I heed warnings throughout the day if I am not in tune with God? How can I live without Him?

I used to wake up and pray as I made my bed and brushed my teeth but not anymore. I rise and then get on my knees and bow before Him , first thing in the morning.

Charles Stanley was once asked by a member of his congregation if prayer always had to be said on their knees and he answered, "No, but remember who you are talking to ." So I try to pray on my knees as much as I can ALONG with talking to Him throughout the day, as I wash the dishes or crochet or brush my teeth or cook.

I woke up today determined to live my life fully for Christ. I am looking forward to the day when I wake up not determining to do it, not pushing my way to do it but that living for Christ becoming something natural as natural as breathing. I don't have to be determined to breathe, I just breathe.

It's that time again when I look at my spiritual life and examine, self-evaluate it.
I was listening to a study and it was tremendously edifying.
This is what I got out of it; I need to have a determined purpose. I have often wanted to bury myself in all things spiritual, reading the Word, worship, studying, meditating as much as I can to get to that place where I have a spiritual relationship with Christ that is bringing me closer to Him and an understanding of what it is, to truly be Christ-like. I want clarity in the Lord. I want to know Christ just like I know everything about my best friend I want to know everything I can about Him.
I believe that the Holy Spirit will reveal God to me and He will disclose Himself to me (at least what He feels I should know.) I don't know enough about God , I need more, and I have a yearning to want to know more.
The Apostle Paul expresses this perfectly when he says in the new testament book of Phillipians, chapter 3:10 "...that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death."
The little that I know is worth the loss of everything else I identify myself with in my life and the more that He chooses to reveal to me, the better. My friends and family may not understand but I think I need to grow up already (spiritually)"... put away childish things." 1Cor. 13:12. There are people who leave everything they have behind and seek refuge in God.
Being alone with Him and learning from Him would be so great.
My determined purpose is to know Him and to pull any fragments of knowledge of who I think Christ is and see if I am right or if my perception of Him is all wrong.I don't want to get emotional I want to know GOD!

Swimming In Gods River

I am going to try to recap our Sunday Sermons so this will be the first recap. The sermon was given by Pastor Angel Roman. I have a copy of his outline and will translate it from Spanish to English . In green are the Pastors words.

The sermon started with a reading of Ezekiel 47:3-5

3 When the man went forth eastward with the line in his hand, he measured a thousand cubits, and he caused me to pass through the waters, waters that were to the ankles. 4 Again he measured a thousand, and caused me to pass through the waters, waters that were to the knees. Again he measured a thousand, and caused me to pass through the waters , waters that were to the loins. 5 Afterward he measured a thousand; and it was a river that I could not pass through; for the waters were risen, waters to swim in, a river that could not be passed through.

It is my prayer that this message is of great blessing and edification in your lives and that God through His Holy Spirit give you the bravery and confidence to follow in His glorious path.

I would like to remind you of the story of two men who had to confront the rivers in their lives and were triumphant and powerful in God as a result. These men experimented the power of God in their lives in an extraordinary way.

Joshua

Joshua became the successor to Moses and brought Israel to the promised land but not without crossing a river. Joshua could have remained looking at Jericho from a distance and not cross the river to conquer it BUT he was obedient to the voice of God and crossed the river.

Don't remain on the riverside, watching the blessing flow by, it is necessary to cross the water and conquer the promise.

In the Book of Joshua , The High Priest had to wet their feet and the water stopped.

The Lord helped Joshua lead the Hebrew people into the Promised Land. When they entered this land, the Israelites had to cross the Jordan River. At God’s command, Joshua told the priests to take the Ark of the Covenant into the river.
No sooner had they wet their feet in the water than the river parted. The water that flowed from the upper reaches of the river came to a stop like a wall, and the lower part of the river flowed down to the sea and all the people crossed over the dry river bed.

You have to wet your feet in order to receive the blessing from God.

In 2 Kings Chapter 2 :13-14, we see the prophet Elisha standing at the edge of the river to strike the river with Elijah's cape and in this way receive a double portion of The Spirit. We cannot just watch the water of the river flow by us. We can pray and those prayers can strike the rivers in our lives and open a path.

There are three levels we must pass through to finally be completely submerged in The Spirit, ankle length, knee length, loin length and finally, completely submerged.

There are three categories of people in life, today. Those who;

1- Make things happen

2- Watch things happen

3- Don't know what's happening

Ezekiel saw a great revival and a healing in the waters. To be able to experiment it we must at least begin with getting as deep as our ankles. If we want to begin to experience a life full of miracles, blessings, and a life fuller in The Spirit, we should allow The Holy Spirit to reach our ankles . We should be at least ankle-deep in the river, but we can't stay there.

Ezekiel says that The Measurer in the story measured another 1,000 cubits (which by the way, according to http://www.csgnetwork.com/cubitscnv.html is equivalent to 20.5 inches or 1.7 feet for those who want a clearer picture). The Measurer made the man go into the water until it reached his knees. We note that this time he brought him in a little deeper. He is now knee-length.

God wants us to shed our fears and have deeper experiences.

We should not conform to simply touching the blessings of God, ankle length, but we should allow ourselves to get knee-deep.

Ezekiel goes on to say that The Measurer measured another 1,000 cubits and made the man get waist deep. We realize that every time The Measurer measures, God submerges the man deeper. It was not enough to be ankle deep or knee-deep but now the man had to be waist-deep.

As time goes on God wants us to experience more and more of Him and submerge ourselves deeper in Him.

The Measurer finally measures the last 1,000 cubits and the man arrived at a point in the river where he could not pass unless he submerged himself completely and swam.

God does not only want to bring us to deeper places, but he wants us to learn how to swim in them, that we may experience a great revival and not remain on the riverside watching it go by. He wants us to experience His power and majesty.

What distances you from experiencing a great revival in your life?

A complete surrender.

You must surrender completely to Christ to experience the revival in your life.

God Bless You

Measuring Your Committment

God wants to use us in an extraordinary way. It all depends on how much of an instrument we want to be for God. In the verses above the man could contemplate/reflect on the river, watch the river flow by or get in it and move with the current. As he gets into the river, he gets deeper and deeper.
The Measurer guided and instructed the man to go with the current in the river and onto new ground.

We can choose to stand by the river and look across it and wish we were there or we can get in and let it lead us to newer ground. We should not be afraid of the current in the river it will take us to a better place.

The river here is symbolic of The Spirit of God and the current is symbolic of how we should allow ourselves to be fully submerged in His Spirit and let the current of the Spirit lead us to new ground and follow the path that God has set before us.

In the verses above we see that the man is led to the water and the water reaches his ankles, then farther on down reaches his knees, then the water reaches his loins and eventually the water is so high that the only means to navigate would be to swim.

Sink or Swim.

You can be an ankle length Christian and just dab your toes in the water. A Christian who does not want to delve too much into The Spirit or you can be a Christian who is submerged in The Spirit.

Morning

I went to bed at three thirty in the morning. I found a site that contains free movie scripts so I read a couple of them just to get a feel of what a real script looks like. My scripts don't look so bad compared to these.

There are some abbreviations on the real scripts and some lingos I don't get but I could always google those and find out what they mean.

It took a while for me to fall asleep after reading. For some reason, last night every sound that I heard in the apartment caused me to jump. I found the humming of the air conditioner quite reassuring because I knew it probably drowned out some of the creepy sounds I didn't hear but knew were there. I try to relax and think of a comforting verse.

For God hath not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

Ahh Good Old Timothy 1:7

Hubby woke up at seven-thirty this morning. I knew this because my groggy self looked at the alarm clock by the bed. He tells me to go back to sleep. I close my eyes because I am still very sleepy. I begin calculating in my head, How many hours of sleep have I had, so far? Four hours. Not enough.

Then I hear the spare change being removed by Hubby from the pockets of the pants he wore to church yesterday, the last pair he wore that were hanging pathetically over the chair in my bedroom, causing weird monster shapes just last night, four hours ago. I dont have to open my eyes to know exactly what he is doing. But I pray he does it quickly so I could go back to sleep. He opens the third draw of a very small chest consisting of three drawers. The first contains nickels, the second, dimes and the third quarters. By the sound of the coin hitting the drawer and joining the other coins I can tell which drawer he opened and which coin he placed in what drawer. He doesn't make an effort to do this quietly and he is taking way too much time doing it. I close my eyes tighter and scream at him angrily (in my head, of course) "Put the darn coins in and go to work already!" I open my eyes and face him with a look of unbelief. "What!?"

"Shhhh, go back to sleep." He whispers.

I still have some sleep left. So I turn quickly and angrily and bury my head in my pillows and cover my head with the comforter. This feels so good and I begin to drift off, when I feel the comforter slowly uncovering my head and Hubby bends down to kiss me goodbye. I force a "How sweet" smile when I secretly want to kill him.

"Take it easy today and....

Is he talking to me now!!!!! Go away!!!! Go to Work!!!!! I want to sleep!!!!!

"Relax Debbie, this is not good or positive. Your attitude stinks right now."

I try to relax. It's not Hubby's fault that I am such a light sleeper.

He leaves. I hear the bedroom door close and then he is gone.

Great, now I have to go to the bathroom . I debate whether it could wait and I could manage to fall back to sleep with a full bladder or should I walk to the bathroom with my eyes closed, so I don't lose the bit of sleep I have left and rely on my memory to guide me to the bathroom. I decide on the latter. During my walk to the bathroom, I hear something I open my eyes and through the open door of the bathroom I could see Hubby removing the trash from the kitchen trash can and replacing the bag. I shut the bathroom door.

Mission Accomplished.

I am no longer sleepy.

I return to bed and try to summon sleep. I hear the front door lock. I get in my "comfy, comforter and place it over the head with my face buried in pillows" position.

Nothing. Maybe if I turn the air conditioner off. I get up and turn it off and return to the position. I can't. Frustrated I lie on my back and stare at the light fixture on the ceiling. "Darn!"

Blissful sleep is all gone.

Now my head is buzzing with all these ideas. Writing ideas, perhaps brought on by reading last night.

I sit upright and grab my laptop which sits waiting on the third (top of three) hatboxes by my bed. I use these hatboxes for storage and they're pretty enough to be by my bed.

I turn the laptop on. Then I hit programs, then Micros*ft Word. A new blank document pops up. I stare at it, then I stare at the cursor as it blinks. I close the window and get out of programs. I click on Intern*t Explor*r, then click favorites and then click Reflections of A Pastor's Wife. It opens to the Bl*gger's sign in page. I sign in and write the first thing I can think of which happens to be what you are reading now. Something I audaciously believe will be of great interest to you and now that I have wasted your time I will reread the post. Then I'll hit publish and then I will compulsively View Blog to see if it's there. When I see it, I will sign out, close the window, close all the other open windows. Click on start, then click on Turn off computer then I will click hibernate. My computer will take approximtely eighteen seconds to go dark. I know this because I count everything. Very OCD. When it is off I close my laptop and feel the familiar click as the lid closes, Then I'll brush my teeth and make myself a cup of coffee. By midday I will miss Hubby, because it will be too quiet in here.

Morning

Thank You is Not Enough

"Thank you" is such a small phrase to show gratitude to a God so wonderful, A God who sent His one and only Son to die on the cross for all of us, for me.

I did not reside in Orphan Annie's "cell block" in the orphanage but boy did I have a hard knock life. I have experienced things that some of you could never even imagine and have lived through it all.

Why?

Because God has never left my side and His faitfulness is awesome.

I reflect a lot. I suppose it's because I am a writer but in my reflections, I laugh, I get angry, I cry but most of all I rejoice.

What have I triumphed through with God's help?

So many things. So many horrors. But only for God to always be glorified at the end.

I have been attacked on more than one occassion.

I have had a gun pointed to my head, twice.

I have been on deaths door a few times.

I have seen abuse in my family as a child and have experienced it first hand from a self proclaimed atheistic father, young and overwhelmed with family and responsibilities.

I have experienced death in my family, loved ones who have surely gone to be with the Lord and others that I pray, repented before dying.

I wear the scars of major surgeries that have practically cut me in half.

I have lost dear friends.

I have lost possessions of things that were precious to me.

And yet...I can not cease Thanking God, daily for my life.

I have been attacked but I have been rescued and lived to tell the story another day and to console others who have gone through the same experieince and tell them "I know what you are going through." without being hypocritical or insensitive.

I have had a gun pointed to my head and have had the shooter run away,cry or fall on thier knees and ask for forgiveness.

I have had a knife pointed to my neck, the tip burying in, only to have the assailant flee for no apparent reason (that he knows of)

I have returned from experiencing God glorious wonders in a Holy Spirit packed service just to get beaten by my father as soon as I walked through my front door at home, just because I attended church.

I have been told I will die by my doctors and here I am typing these words to you.

Those who do not know God would probably think I should be resentful, bitter or angry but I can't be.

Don't be mistaken there are times when the "Why me?" person comes out but then there is that ever consoling, loving hand that reassures me that I was never alone and will never be alone and through the good times and the bad, through the celebrations and the grief, He will be there for me always.

Thank You Father for my life, spiritually,physically and emotionally.

Thank you for the friends you have given me near and far.

Thank you for giving me an appreciation to embrace the differences in my friends and to celebrate the diversity of your people.

Thank you for friends of all different shapes, sizes, ethnicities, religions and backgrounds.

Thank you for my husband, my precious loving husband, we grew together in you and have lived God centered our entire married life.

Thank you for my dear, dear children from birth to womanhood. They have grown so much. Thank you for letting me witness their enormous stages of development, thier successes, thier triumphs.

Thank you for allowing me to witness thier first steps,words, phrases and praises to You.

Thank you for allowing me to hold thier tiny, fragile and beautiful bodies in my hands and for giving me the privilege to see them walk down the wedding aisle, preach a sermon, become productive citizens in society and making thier mark as Christians.

Thank you for the laughter.

Thank you for my sense of humor.

Thank you for the humor in my family and friends.

Thank you for my appreciation of music and literature.

Thank you for my voice.

Thank you for my words.

Thank you for those who teach me about You.

Thank you for the abiltiy to understand Your word.

Thank you for the Holy Spirit who You have sent to guide us.

Thank You for Your Son, the greatest gift of all.

My Thank you list can go on forever but as you can see it is much longer than my prior list.

This doesn't mean that I will not suffer, it only means that I have hope and peace and strength through those few times of suffering.

Thank you is such a small phrase for the ultimate gift given to me, my salvation through Jesus Christ, the son of God.

Count it all Joy as long as your will is being done, Father.

God is good......All The Time!

How many times have you heard this "chant" being said from the altar of your church, "God is good!! All the time!!! (and) All the time ...(of course the entire...well at least most of the congregation who is awake will reply)God is good!!!!

I have come up with a phrase or at least I think I have, someone else as clever as I am could have thought up the same phrase...anyway the phrase is " automatic praising" I hear and see it so often in church and quite honestly it is a pet peeve of mine to observe people rummaging through their purses, looking through their wallets, biting their nails or picking their nose very non chalantly when suddenly the person in the altar request a praise, they respond with such a lack of enthusiasm. Seriously...why bother? Argghh!

It irks me so, because praise is something so wonderful. It should be offered to our God in honesty, love and sincerity.

Psalm 66 " 1 Shout with joy to God, all the earth! 2 Sing the glory of his name; make his praise glorious! 3 Say to God, "How awesome are your deeds! So great is your power that your enemies cringe before you. 4 All the earth bows down to you; they sing praise to you, they sing praise to your name."

God is so wonderful, so much so that praise should spew out of our mouth with ease just because of who He is. If we were to think about all the good things He has done for us, and the fact that He sent His Son to die for our sins, praise shouldn't be a problem.

A very funny friend of mine whose humor bordered inappropriateness, LOL...Well, she would get as irked as I would with automatic praisers and everytime someone would repeat the "God is good all the time" prompt., she would tell me that they might as well respond to the prompt with "Ham and Cheese" so it would sound like "God is good, Ham and cheese."

Offensive? Yes! Just as offensive as wording praise insincerely. Just as offensive as not wanting to praise Him. Some say that praise is difficult for them because they don't have the eloquent praise "lingo "as others do, and it often reminds me of a song I heard years ago and it was one of my favorites..

"Even the praise comes from You

Every prayer that I raise comes from You

Fill my mouth with words of worship

And I'll give them back to You'

Cause Lord they're not my own

They come from You alone

Even the Praise, every feeling and phrase

Even the Praise comes from You"

There are so many levels to your personal life with Christ and one of those levels is to get to a point of spiritual maturity where you realize the greatness of God and believe me the praise will flow out of your mouth with such beautiful fluidity. Praise Him for who He is! Praise Him for what He has done! Praise Him for His love and Kindness and for His mercy and grace! But praise Him with an honest heart, a heart willing and hungry to praise! God Bless You!!!

My Church Life Through The Years

My earliest memory of church attendance is Sunday school. I remember sleeping over my grandmother’s house on Saturday night so that I could attend church on Sunday morning.

My parents were not Christian so my grandmother was the sole spiritual guide in the family. Being dropped off at Sunday school was an emotional mixture of feelings for me. I had severe separation anxiety and did not want my grandmother to leave my side but once I saw the friendly face of my Sunday school teacher I was fine.

Class consisted of a short prayer along with an offering collection; this is where I would drop my sweaty quarter into an envelope held by whoever had the privilege to collect offering. For some of us the collection of offering was our first church job. As for my offering, I held tightly to that quarter because I didn’t want to lose God’s money. My grandma was emphatic about my responsibility to give God that quarter and in doing so, instilled in me a great respect for being obedient to God.

Offering would be followed by a colorful Bible story. This would be followed by a wrap up of the lesson with an art project. I remember coloring paper doll Jesus’, along with Paul, Adam and Eve many times over and placing them in story sequence with the help of my teacher on a felt board where Jesus miraculously stayed adhered. Then my S.S. teacher would give us all a lollipop as she sent us off to our guardians. This is when my devotion to prayer began as I prayed that I would not get the green lollipop.

Being a teenager isn’t easy for any teen ever in the history of the world. Is this an overdramatic statement? Maybe. But for most teens not understated at all. In my opinion, teens have it hard. Teenagers are in the midst of morphing into young adults and there are plenty of growing pains.

I can honestly say... attending church and having Christ in my life alleviated much of the necessary growth pain. We have to grow, and it is difficult. There is no getting by the need to grow physically, emotionally and spiritually and the journey to maturity can be quite daunting, but I can honestly say being an active member in the youth society of church, distracted me from the hardships of being a teen and growing into adulthood. That is not to say that my teen years were easy, but I had the comfort and the accessability to Christ that made it so much more tolerable.

I remember all night youth vigils when we actually stayed... all night, until morning. We would bring our pillows and blankets, but we would stay awake so as not to miss anything. This was a great time in my life I was witness to miracles,deliverances and prophecies.

There were the youth trips to Great Adventure, campaigns, conventions and other activities that kept us involved and off the streets, so to speak. There were the birthday celebrations, Christmas parties, sneaking off to the church kitchen during service because our hunger pangs kept us from paying attention to the preaching; at least that is what we used as an excuse. You have to be pretty prayed up to resist the smell of home cooking wafting through the vents and into the temple. Estebania's pastelillos and Acapurrias were very tempting.

After the Friday night youth service, the youth would get together at Charlie’s’ pizzeria, until Charlie would kick us out. We were pretty rowdy Pentecostals, but keep in mind we were also teens and still growing.

As an adult, church life, attending and participating ,was a great part of my Christian walk. It was very edifying and needed. As a young mother,wife and a student, church activities had not waned but instead grew as I longed to share my church life with my daughters and set an example of the importance of fellowship. I taught Missionettes, Sunday school and performed solos for the Lord. My husband and I were youth pastors and accepted any other activity that we were called to do, dragging our three girls along.

My church life has not ended, it continues, as a second generation of our family has joined the church life. Church life is just a part of out spiritual walk but an immensly important one. Fellowship is key to any Christian’s life, as we are all part of Gods family, and it should be a priority to get together at our Fathers house.

It is of the greatest importance to hear what He wants to say to us as a whole and this is where it differs from our individual walk with Christ.

We are the church and we need to be united so that we can be in one accord and therefore have the capacity to hear what God is trying to tell His church, His children, as we gather together to worship, adore, honor and serve Him.

Imagine your family, your father, your mother and sisters and brothers united by blood. Imagine gathering together, every member of your family and honoring your parents and serving each other, while learning together about life from your father and spiritual leader of the home. Allowing him to guide you and teach you about life. What a great concept.

Take that very concept and apply it to your church family. It is the same, without Church life, There is no Christian family to be a part of .

Our church family includes brothers and sisters united by the blood of Christ, gathering together, each and every single member, honoring God and serving each other. The church family learns from the Heavenly Father and allows His guidance to lead our paths; His will has to take precedence over all.

My physical church life will end when I have passed away from this earth or when the church is taken up to Heaven via rapture and then together we are with our Heavenly Father eternally.

Then my church life through the years will come to its true realization.

Be Blessed